Roman Emperors: Totalus Rankium

Arcadius, our second puppet emperor. Judge him against most, then he won't do well, but how does he compare to Valentinian II? Is he as useless? Does he have any redeeming features? 

But let's be honest. No one is going to remember this as the Arcadius episode. This will always be the episode where Rob tells Jamie, in detail, how the Romans created their Eunuchs. Never before has a recording session been spent with as much time with crossed legs. 

East and West are splitting, political, cultural and religious differences are forcing this divide. But one man has the honour of being The Last Man To Rule The Undivided Empire. And he is know as The Great! what can possibly go wrong here? So, pull up a chair and listen as we find out just how great he is. does he rid the empire of the Goths? does he settle all the religious disputes? Oh, and check the exits... always check the exits... this one has a temper.

It's tough being 4 years old. Everything is too big, you have to eat your greens, you are getting to grips with this toilet business, and your mother and the most powerful bishop in the west of the empire are playing tug-of-war with your existence. Oh, and a scary man with a cool name, who already killed your brother, is coming to kill you also. 

It took Little Val several years before he attempted to get control over his fate... in retrospect, maybe he shouldn't have bothered. 

The Nameth Maketh the Maneth. Or at least so though Magnus' parents, who clearly thought that calling their dear child the 'Greatest Great' who ensure great things. And, to be fair, he became an Roman emperor. But does he live up to the name? Why does he hate heretics? And why does he need to please the Bishop Ambrose, despite the fact that he hates the man? Find out in this week's Totalus Rankium!